super neato holiday cardz

ok you beautiful primate here’s what’s going to happen. you put your address in here, and I’ll send you a card for holiday times. don’t fuck this up for us

Sorry, I only made 100 cards, try again next year! It'll also be available online after a fashion.

[click here for faqs]

OFFICIAL FAQS SECTION OF WEBSITE PAGE

q: what are you doing this year?

a: if you’ve signed up before, you know I like to keep things pretty light and fun. this year I’ve created a card that some might call “dark”

q: is this a real thing?

a: yes

q: are you secretly an SEO Guru® who will add my info to some fucked up list?

a: uh oh maybe

q: I am prim and proper and do not like things that are bright or offensive or covered in lasagna. should I sign up?
a: yes, it will open your mind

q: can I trust you with my mailing address?

a: no

q: should I sign up?

a: no

q: will the holiday card be very cool and also illicit a humor response?

a: yes